Yesterday I was HONORED GUEST of a hotel up in another city. Super dope suite, evening reception and no one calling me “hey you” or “fuck you,” which is apparently my other name.
After the concert we went to last night I ended up down in the lobby watching tv and just generally hanging out with night audit. I taught him how to turn off keys (he’d never heard of this before, that you can lock people out, what?) and then some assholes tried to come in and check in without a reservation without a credit card and tried to argue with him about it.
As any good former Brand Emissary would do I stood up and walked over to the desk while these dudes gave this nice NA shit and NA straight up looked them in the eye and said “You do realize that this is my manager? She’s off duty right now but she’s going to tell you the same thing I just did.”
And I said “That’s correct. Our hotel policy is that you must produce a credit card and an ID to check in. If you require to stay longer than 12 noon today, you will be paying for two nights. If this is unacceptable to you, David will help you find alternate lodging.”
Now mind you, I’d just left a punk show and had my nose ring in and my eyebrow ring in and huge door knocker earrings.
They believed me and VIOLA suddenly had a credit card and my new friend checked them in with no issue.
When they left, we high fived and I went to bed.