how do you survive on your own · la la la lobby time · sold out! · Uncategorized

drunky mcpukey man

So last night I finish my 3-11 and I’m chilling in the lobby talking to NA while I wait for my husband to pick me up when a car rolls up and my NA and I look at each other and go “be an uber, be an uber” because hey it’s 11 and we’re sold out and everyone was already in house.

Be careful what you wish for.

The Uber driver gets out and she’s a small college girl and I see her go around to the back and start trying to rouse a lump in the back seat. I look at NA and I’m like “This is going to be a problem.”

Girl finally gets dude in the back out and he immediately starts stumbling like he’s got vertigo and when I see him start to go down I just ran outside. Luckily he landed on his hands and was only spitting on my driveway. I tell the driver that I work at the hotel and will take care of him from there.

Drunky bounces back up and starts stumbling around and almost hits the dirt again and I catch him. I’m 5’2″ and 115 pounds and this dude is old enough to be someone’s dad and is around 6’4″. I start trying to guide him towards the lobby to sit down while trying to see if he can remember what room he’s in when he takes off running again and starts throwing up in our flowerbed.

He finally empties himself out and sits down on the curb but he’s starting to fall over. So I open the side door to our lobby and yell for my partner to come out and help me because if this guy passes out on the sidewalk I’m not going to be able to wake this dude again by myself.

We get a last name out of Drunky and I ran in and looked up the last name and call that room.

Me: Hello Mrs McGuest this is the hotel front desk, are you missing any one from your party?

Guest: Well no

Me: Oh I apologize then, there is a gentleman in our lobby who claims to belong to you and…

Guest: Oh for fucks sake is Drunky down there wasted in the lobby again?

Me: He’s definitely in need of assistance.

Guest: Oh goddamnit. Okay I’ll send Bob down to get him.

I went outside and told Mr Drunky I’d be standing with him until his friend arrived and after a bit, Bob showed up to get his friend up to their room and thanked me for watching his friend and not calling the cops.

As I was walking off to get in the truck and go home as my husband had been waiting for 20 minutes for me to go home, I hear Bob say “Jesus Christ Drunky I just left you three hours ago and you were fine.”

Drunky: Fuck you man 3 hours iz alzzotof shotzzzzz

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